Tired

    Sometimes, it's so easy to just throw in the towel and be done. A lot can happen in a small amount of time. My situation went from hopeless to having small hope, to it's done and there's nothing I can do now. It's not so much that I'm depressed, but disappointed, sad, and bitter. I wanted stuff to work out, I really did. But obviously, someone doesn't care enough to try to fix it. We're all tired, I think, of putting up with the same crap, living a dull life, being stressed, and everything else.
And you know what really sucks the most? I can't even talk about this personally to some of my closest friends. I don't want them to judge or look at this person differently. Only some people know.
I know God works miracles, and if He worked a miracle in this season of my life, that would be amazing. It really would. Blergggh. I hate how all my posts are so depressing -.-
This is definitely a personal personal blog. I guess this is why even more I like to immerse myself in my music, K-pop, and K-drama stuff. Take my mind off whatever I don't like to deal with.

Happy Post Time

HAPPY post time! I've realized my other posts were pretty depressing and blah. But hey, I'm back and feel like a new person. I admit I was going through crap and I felt like it too, probably to the point where I was depressed but I'm over that little block in the road. I haven't felt this happy in a while!And since I’m on summer break, I’ve decided to set some goals. 

My first one is writing. I have no idea where I got this sudden inspiration to write, but its back and want to improve myself not only as a storyteller but as a blogger as well. So I’ve been trying to write at least every day. I have at least 3 or 4 stories I’m writing, the other is a collaboration. Blogging wise, I will attempt to keep up with my personal blog, but the one I really want to focus on is my Review blog. My review blog is basically me reviewing a drama, movie, or anime. This will really test my observing skills, so let’s see how well I can dissect what I’ve watched. The other reason I wanted to start this was I wanted to take a movie or anime and view it from a Biblical worldview. I would try for the drama but I can’t think when watching a drama; there’s too much to take in with the storyline and who’s who.

Second goal is to lose weight, get in shape, and eat healthy. I started eating healthy this week by not eating a big portion of all meals. I cut back on my juices as well. Now the next step is to get my lazy butt to exercise. I’ll probably be doing some beach body. Just getting in shape with Shaun T. and possibly Tony Horton. If I decide not to do P90X then it’s going to be Taibo with Billy Blanks. Hopefully I’ll also be able to swim this summer as well, build up strong lungs and get my arms to be toned.

Third goal is getting my drivers permit, practicing to drive, and get a job. It’s a slow progress but I’m getting there. Hopefully I pass. In all honesty, I really need to learn how to drive so I can help my mom out and go places I want to go without asking my parents.

JOB!  I really need a job. At this point I should take whatever job I can, but I can’t help but feel picky. If I’m going to work I may as well get something I don’t hate.

Fourth goal is a selfish one. I’m going to challenge myself and see how many K-dramas and anime I can watch this summer. I watched a handful last summer, so I wanna see if I can beat my record. Plus, it’s always cool to add a drama to the “Already Watched” List (:

   So I’ve established what goals I have for this summer and hopefully they’ll be able to be fulfilled. I just gotta work hard!! But I think the fourth goal is a no problem for me. I love my dramas and anime, no matter how irritated I get with the storyline and characters.

Until next time…annyeong! 

P.S. Here’s the link to my Drama Review page-à http://kmadnessasianaddict.blogspot.com/

Also, listen to some happy music :3 Don't Blink by Relient K

Don't Give Up and Not Slow Down

Tonight I've been feeling the melancholy of everything and it just hit me. I've realized my posts have been somewhat depressing and stuff..well here's another one.

those feeling when you want to give up.

 Today, I was given some news that would probably be a change. Some peeps cried, I cried and just the thought of it, is hard to imagine.
Such is life right? It's not permanent, only for season. But I just wished there was a better outcome. I guess this was another thing to add on to my worries. I'm honestly just at a loss for words. You don't even know the sadness I had.
  Although this seems like a time where everything is going wrong, I believe it was also a blessing in disguise from God. I think He wants me to step up my game, especially in a time where I wanna do nothing BUT give up.  Actually since this week started, although I've felt happier than last week, I feel like the devil has attacked me, especially during the times where I was weak and just gave in to my weaknesses. But I feel like this is a good time to start becoming stronger; spiritually as well as physical. I want to be the light in a dark world and I know I'm not alone. I also got people who will keep me accountable to my actions and how I live my life.

  So as of now, it still sucks, but I'm going to be positive about it all and know that God has something in store and I'm ready to embrace whatever He has for me. As Mitch says, "This isn't the end, it's just the beginning," or something like that.

Peace and Reassurance

         Do you know what I love?
I love being able to show the real me to friends I really trust and be able to express my true feelings. It makes me realize I depend on my church family more than I realize. I know that I can count on them for prayer and for comfort. Not that my family canNOT give this to me because they can, but there are similar friends who are just dealing with the same things as me or similar to me. There was that definite reassurance tonight as my friend's prayed for me and we prayed for each other. I'm really glad I can count on them and I trust them like you wouldn't believe.
So although tonight (Thursday) was emotionally draining for me, I feel at peace and had a reassured confirmation that everything will work out and God has a bigger plan for me. Whatever I'm going through, it's happening for a reason and I just need to trust in Him.







~~Trusting in God~~